{"id":219109,"date":"2026-01-27T12:06:25","date_gmt":"2026-01-27T12:06:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/entertainment.runfyers.com\/index.php\/2026\/01\/27\/sarah-shahis-biggest-steve-howey-split-dating-revelations-in-new-book\/"},"modified":"2026-01-27T12:06:25","modified_gmt":"2026-01-27T12:06:25","slug":"sarah-shahis-biggest-steve-howey-split-dating-revelations-in-new-book","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/entertainment.runfyers.com\/index.php\/2026\/01\/27\/sarah-shahis-biggest-steve-howey-split-dating-revelations-in-new-book\/","title":{"rendered":"Sarah Shahi\u2019s Biggest Steve Howey Split, Dating Revelations in New Book"},"content":{"rendered":"


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Sarah Shahi<\/strong><\/a>\u2018s new book addresses her high profile split from Steve Howey<\/strong>, relationship with now-ex Adam Demos<\/strong><\/a> and more dating stories in an effort to offer readers advice they can utilize in their own lives.<\/p>\n

Life Is Lifey: The A to Z\u2019s on Navigating Life\u2019s Messy Middle<\/em>, out on Tuesday, January 27, dove into Shahi\u2019s decision to file for divorce<\/a> from Howey after playing an unfulfilled housewife on Netflix\u2019s hit series Sex\/Life<\/em>.<\/p>\n

\u201cAs fate so divinely orchestrated, while I was filming Sex\/Life, I was going through my own personal transformation. I\u2019d been married for almost twelve years, together for nearly twenty, but my relationship was plagued by problems other than a fantasy man from the past,\u201d she wrote of her offscreen love life. \u201cThe years of frustration that came from living a life well below my full potential finally came to a head. I was tired, bloated, and uninspired. The only \u2018self-care\u2019 ritual I had was the ten minutes a night I picked food out of my teeth.\u201d<\/p>\n

Shahi, 46, and Howey, 48, met on the set of Reba<\/em><\/a>, dating for several years before getting married in 2009. They were together for over a decade \u2014 and welcomed three kids \u2014 before Shahi filed for divorce in 2020.<\/p>\n

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\n Related: <\/span>Steve Howey and Sarah Shahi’s Relationship Timeline: The Way They Were<\/span><\/a>
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\n\t\t\tSteve Howey and Sarah Shahi were together for nearly two decades before calling it quits. The twosome first crossed paths in 2003 when Shahi appeared on an episode of Reba, which aired the following year. Howey, for his part, portrayed Van on the WB sitcom, which ran from 2001 to 2007. Shahi sparked a romantic [\u2026]\t\t<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

\u201cIt worked out for both parties involved. There is no failure here,\u201d Shahi exclusively shared in her January Us Weekly<\/em> cover story. \u201cI was in a relationship for 18 years and have three beautiful kids. It is by every definition a success to me and we have a beautiful relationship \u2014 Steve and I \u2014 now as coparents. It\u2019s important to show the kids, in my opinion, that when something is out of sync, you have to have the courage to let it go.\u201d<\/p>\n

Shahi subsequently found love with her Sex\/Life<\/em> costar Demos<\/a>. Following five years of dating, Shahi broke her silence to Us<\/em> about their split, saying, \u201cThere was an element of the relationship that people really felt belonged to them, which was very sweet and heart- warming.\u201d<\/p>\n

She continued: \u201cThe flip to that is when things end, you feel like you\u2019re going through it twice. You\u2019re going through it emotionally on a personal level, and then you\u2019re going through it again on a much bigger level.\u201d<\/p>\n

While Life Is Lifey<\/em> touched on Shahi\u2019s divorce from Howey numerous times, it made no obvious mention of Demos. Shahi\u2019s personal life, career challenges and childhood trauma was mentioned in an effort to inspire others to make changes to benefit themselves.<\/p>\n

Life Is Lifey<\/em> is available now. Keep reading for some of the biggest takeaways:<\/p>\n

Sarah Recalls Telling Steve That Their Marriage Was Over<\/h2>\n
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Kevin Winter\/Getty Images<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

In the tell-all<\/a>, Sarah Shahi said she struggled for a while before finally pulling the plug on her marriage, writing, \u201c\u2018I finally love myself more.\u2019 Those five words took ten years to say. My voice shook the whole time. \u2018I do love you,\u2019 I repeated, \u2018But I finally love myself more.’\u201d<\/p>\n

She continued: \u201cWith tears cascading down my face, I\u2019d just told my husband of eleven years that I wanted a divorce. I wanted to leave the life we\u2019d shared for more than eighteen years with three healthy children and a cute little rescue dog to do life on my own. I hadn\u2019t been on my own since I was twenty-two. I was now forty. And my tits weren\u2019t as perky. Now that\u2019s courage.\u201d<\/p>\n

The Signs Sarah Noticed Before the Split<\/h2>\n
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Andrew Toth\/Getty Images for Entertainment Weekly<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Sarah Shahi recalled being stuck in a routine at home that made her feel stilled. While addressing other women who could be going through a similar experience, Shahi said she would have many \u201cannoying\u201d days where her focus was on feeding her children and supporting her husband\u2019s rough days that led to \u201cconsolation\u201d that took \u201cmore damn work than the kids.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI can\u2019t go from friend to child to partner to pet making service calls,\u201d she noted. \u201c\u2018Yes, we can do the playdate after school. Sure, we can get sushi for dinner. I\u2019d love to clean the kitchen. Oh, it would be my pleasure to give you a blowjob when the kids go down!’\u201d<\/p>\n

The Issue Sarah Faced Getting Back Into Dating<\/h2>\n
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Charley Gallay\/Getty Images for Netflix<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

The day of Sarah Shahi\u2019s tough conversation with now-ex-husband Steve Howey was also when the U.S. went into lockdown due to the COVID pandemic. This resulted in Shahi\u2019s personal life taking another hit as she recalled not being able to \u201cgo out and rub up against every cute guy.\u201d<\/p>\n

Sarah Touches on Steve\u2019s Reaction to Their Divorce<\/h2>\n
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Sarah Shahi called her divorce the breakup<\/a> that gave her a \u201cPhD in pain,\u201d adding, \u201cThough it truly was best for everyone involved, seeing his wet signature on the final divorce paper was like having a piano dropped on my heart.\u201d<\/p>\n

The Message Sarah Got From Warner Bros. Executive on a Dating App<\/h2>\n

While swiping on a dating app, Sarah Shahi was contacted by a Warner Brothers executive who texted her, \u201c\u2018Wanna hang with my d*** later?’\u201d<\/p>\n

Sarah\u2019s Respective Blowjob and Orgasms Chapters<\/h2>\n
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Maya Dehlin Spach\/Getty Images<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Life Is Lifey<\/em> used Sarah Shahi\u2019s lived experience as a blueprint<\/a> for other women, with the actress dedicating a chapter to b*** j*** tips she learned when she moved to Los Angeles in the early 2000s. Shahi credited a two-day seminar that helped her gain confidence in the sex act, which she then performed on her boyfriend at the time who was \u201c10 years older, desirable, and a critically acclaimed (in his mind) B+ movie star.\u201d<\/p>\n

Shahi also devoted a separate section to the importance of orgasms, writing, \u201cAfter [Sex\/Life] premiered, what hit me the hardest was learning how many women have never experienced an orgasm. Studies show that up to half of women aren\u2019t satisfied with how often they reach that biological imperative. \u2026. After years of extensive personal research (you\u2019re welcome), I\u2019ve realized that embracing your sexuality is like unlocking the cheat code to your best self.\u201d<\/p>\n

Sarah\u2019s Mentions of Ex-Boyfriends<\/h2>\n

Before moving to Los Angeles, Sarah Shahi dated an unnamed boyfriend in college, who she then cheated on. She recalled becoming a \u201cpart-time bulimic\u201d who \u201cdrank too much\u201d out of guilt. That period in her life resulted in Shahi never cheating in a relationship again.<\/p>\n

She also mentioned an ex from before she met Howey.<\/p>\n

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