David Archuleta<\/strong><\/a> thought there was \u201csomething wrong with [him]\u201d when he started to realise he was gay.<\/p>\nThe 32-year-old pop singer grew up in a religious community and did not understand the heteronormative expectations laid out to him when it was \u201cclear\u201d to him that he had \u201cstrong feelings\u201d towards other boys.<\/p>\n
He told People: \u201cMy sexuality has been a part of me. It\u2019s something that I\u2019ve felt. I can\u2019t say I was fully aware of it, but I knew something was different about me, starting from when I was a little kid in elementary school. People would start talking about crushes. I started feeling that for girls, but then I started feeling it for guys. I was like, \u201cWait, I was always told that this was supposed to be for a girl, so why am I feeling it for boys?\u201d\u2018 I felt really embarrassed. Like how Elsa [from \u2018Frozen\u2019] would say, conceal it, don\u2019t let them in, try to hold it all inside. Growing up in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, everything is about marriage, everything is about having a spouse and creating children with them. But each time that I was trying to date a girl, it was clear that my feelings were equal [to] if not even stronger for guys. I was like, \u2018There must be something wrong with me.’\u201d<\/p>\n
The former \u2018American Idol\u2019 star went on to explain that he felt \u201cmad\u201d about his sexuality until he turned 30 and even ended up \u201cpraying\u201d in an effort to change things but eventually learned to \u201clove and embrace\u201d himself for who he is.<\/p>\n
He added: \u201cI was still feeling mad until I was 30. I was like, \u2018No matter what I do, I don\u2019t know how to change this.\u2019 It got to a point where I was praying and I\u2019m just like, \u201cGod, if you are really there, please. I don\u2019t know what else to do. Am I cursed? Am I supposed to be unhappy for the rest of my life?\u2019<\/p>\n
\u201cFinally, I felt this huge flow of love and peace, and it just said, \u201cDavid, you need to stop asking me this because you\u2019re asking me the wrong thing. You\u2019re asking me to change something that I don\u2019t intend to change. I created you this way the way, the way you were supposed to be, and you need to understand this.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThat really changed my life because I thought I had to hate myself because there was this part of me that was wrong. When I learned to love that and embrace it and just allow it to be, I was like, \u201cWow, I feel this love I never felt for myself ever.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/div>\n
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