\n<\/p>\n
Chris Rock<\/strong> stepped onto Studio 8H looking like a new man. He used his monologue to take whacks at targets both expected and surprising. On the milestone of his old show turning fifty, Rock said \u201cI want to congratulate Lorne Michaels<\/strong> on twenty five great years of Saturday Night Live<\/em>.\u201d Surely Jonah Hill<\/strong> didn\u2019t see the stray coming at the end of Rock’s joke about alleged CEO killer and internet heartthrob Luigi Mangione<\/strong>. \u201cIf he looked like Jonah Hill, nobody would care. They’d have already given him the chair. He’d be dead.\u201d Rock took a swing at pimply creatine bruiser Jake Paul<\/strong> for boxing Mike Tyson<\/strong>. \u201cWho’s he going to fight next, Morgan Freeman<\/strong>?\u201d But Rock saved his sharpest material for skewering those clutching their throats as if the office of the presidency has never seen the cruel and vulgar example of Donald Trump<\/strong>. \u201cCome on man, this is not the most dignified job in the world…I mean you know what country we live in? You know how many rapists are in my wallet right now. A cup of coffee in America costs seven rapists.\u201d Trump’s buddy Elon Musk<\/strong> got a shout-out for being the richest African-American in the world. And, finally, Rock commended Joe Biden<\/strong> for pardoning his son Hunter Biden<\/strong>. \u201cI got to hand it to Joe, he don’t\u00a0move as fast as he used to, he don’t\u00a0talk as fast as he’s used to, but that middle finger still works, boy.\u201d<\/p>\n Rock works best with a mic in his hand, alas. In sketches, he’s going to read a cue card like it\u2019s the bottom row of an eye exam. He fared okay in \u201cMall Santas,\u201d taunting white parents with the options of getting their child\u2019s photo on the lap of a Black Santa or a white one. \u201cWhat is your preference?\u201d he goaded. \u201cWhat do you want Grandma to do with the picture? Do you want to put it on the fridge or in the garage?\u201d To throw shoppers into further disarray he upped the ante with the additional options of a queer female Santa, ho ho ho Jane Wickline<\/strong>, and Emil Wakim<\/strong> looking greasy in a wife beater as Arab Santa.<\/p>\n Just when the show seemed in danger of flat-lining, Rock got a super boost from his old pal Adam Sandler<\/strong>. Sarah Sherman<\/strong> played a needy dingbat of a nurse whom Rock’s doctor didn’t want his team taking to task. \u201cWhen she cries she sounds like a Victorian ghost,\u201d he said, in one of the better lines of the night. Up popped the patient from under his surgical blanket and wouldn’t you know it was Sandler wearing one of his trademark Hawaiian shirts. Sandler has to work to get his blood squirter to go off in Sherman’s face, but then he went to town spraying Ego Nwodim<\/strong>, Bowen Yang<\/strong>, and Wakim, whom the old-timer delighted in telling \u201cSo glad you’re getting air time, good luck, hope your parents are proud of you.\u201d The highlight of the night was Sandler making Rock open his mouth wide to take a gusher of blood down the hatch. It was a big enough wave to shoot Rock’s glasses straight off his face.<\/p>\n Now what to do about Weekend Update? The shtick of Colin Jost<\/strong> and Michael Che<\/strong>, individually and especially as a duo, has grown increasingly tedious. We seem stuck in a pattern of Jost reminding us of what a sullen nerd he was in high school, or him getting teased in some fashion about marrying up with Scarlett Johannson<\/strong>. Meanwhile, we can take bets that Che is going to have a snicker over some lame misogynistic joke that doesn\u2019t get laughs from the studio audience. \u201cA drone crashed into a person\u2019s backyard,\u201d he said tonight, in reference to the New Jersey mystery drone sightings, \u201cbut at least now we know whoever is flying them is a frigging woman.\u201d When his punchline is especially weak and off-putting, he\u2019s gotten in the annoying habit of saying \u201cIt\u2019s the 90s, guys.\u201d Next week we\u2019ll likely be subjected to the boys\u2019 annual tradition of penning jokes for the other to read. Che will chuckle as Jost recites punchlines that paint him as a gleeful white supremacist. Jost will act mortified. I dread it already. These two great talents, the longest tenured Update anchors in the show\u2019s history, can\u2019t have this job forever. Good things should come to an end before they go sour altogether.<\/p>\n The best part of Weekend Update was Wickline, there to supposedly comment on the new Christmas special from Sabrina Carpenter<\/strong>. \u201cI\u2019m actually going to sing a song as her,\u201d she explained with her trademark lack of affect. \u201cFor the purpose of this song, I am her.\u201d She then proceeded to take on the Gaylor theory with a great deadpan song complaining about the internet\u2019s refusal to speculate that she, Carpenter, is secretly gay. \u201cI make out with Jenna Ortega<\/strong>, passionately, and everyone’s like I hear this song is about Shawn Mendes<\/strong>,\u201d she sang. \u201cWhy am I the only straight pop star taken at their word?\u201d By my count Wickline has already appeared three times on Weekend Update in the first half of her freshman season. Maybe just maybe we\u2019ll see her wearing the anchor jacket one day.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n