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During a panel at a screening of Dune: Part Two<\/em> in NYC on September 22, Zendaya<\/strong><\/a> admitted she might not be \u201ccut out\u201d for the life of a celebrity. \u201cI love doing the work, I love being on set\u2026but I am terrified of that [fame] part of it,\u201d she said. \u201cI was a shy kid, always have been, and so this part isn\u2019t natural\u2026. Some people\u2026they enjoy the power that comes from it, and I don\u2019t know if that\u2019s for me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n Whether or not she wants it, the two-time Emmy winner, 28, has been in the public eye since she was a tween on Disney Channel\u2019s Shake It Up<\/em>. \u201cIn a lot of ways, Zendaya says she\u2019s not who people think she is,\u201d an insider exclusively tells Life & Style<\/em>. \u201cShe may project confidence on-screen and on red carpets, but Zendaya has really struggled with the negative side of being in the spotlight, especially with losing her privacy. That\u2019s something she\u2019s had to come to terms with.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n One of the ways she copes is by dressing the part. The Greatest Showman<\/em> actress, who is a staple on \u201cbest dressed\u201d lists<\/a>, calls fashion her \u201carmor to pretend to go out and do the job.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n She\u2019s also got great support from boyfriend Tom Holland<\/strong>, 28. \u201cZendaya doesn\u2019t want to complain too much, it\u2019s just that she does have regrets about how some things have played out,\u201d notes the insider. \u201cAs a child actor himself, Tom has experienced a lot of the same things, though, so he can totally relate. She really credits him with helping her find peace amid the show-business chaos.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n The duo met on the set of 2017\u2019s Spider-Man: Homecoming<\/em>. When they were first photographed smooching<\/a> in 2021? Both Zendaya and Tom felt \u201cviolated,\u201d she has said. \u201cSome moments or things, you wish were your own.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n Still, she has learned to find strength where she can. \u201cI do have control over what I choose to share,\u201d Zendaya explained to Elle<\/em>. \u201cIt\u2019s about protecting the peace and letting things be your own, but also not being afraid to exist.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n In the past, it was because of others\u2019 expectations that Zendaya felt she missed out on experiences like attending a traditional high school. \u201cI\u2019m very tense, and I think that I carry that from being a kid and never really having an opportunity to just try s\u2013t,\u201d she told Vogue<\/em>. \u201cI\u2019m almost going through my angsty teenager phase now, because I didn\u2019t really have the time to do it before\u2026. I was thrust into a very adult position: I was becoming the bread-winner of my family very early, and there was a lot of role-reversal.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n Now that she is an adult, Zendaya has been sifting through her childhood and deciding what\u2019s next. That includes more mature roles, like her recent flick Challengers<\/em><\/a>, but also growing herself. As she told the NYC panel: \u201cI would like to be a person and for people to see me as that first.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<\/p><\/div>\n