Simon Cowell<\/a> grew emotional as he discussed the “hardest thing that ever happened” to him.<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
Simon Cowell grew emotional talking about his parents<\/p>\n
The 64-year-old music mogul lost his dad Eric in 1999 and his mum Julie passed away 16 years later, in 2015, and he’s admitted only believing their “presence” is still with him has got him through his grief.<\/p>\n
Speaking on the ‘Diary of a CEO’ podcast, he said: “Having gone through \u2013 which was, now question, losing both my parents was the hardest thing that ever happened to me.<\/p>\n
“I can sit here honestly \u2013 everyone says, when you lose them, in time it\u2019ll get better. You think,’No it won\u2019t’.<\/p>\n
“The truth is, it does, as long as you believe, and you have to believe that their presence is still there with you.<\/p>\n
\nHe then teared up and said: “And erm, oh gosh\u2026 you have to give me a minute.”<\/p>\n
\nThe ‘Britain’s Got Talent’ judge admitted he was “desperately unhappy” in the wake of his father’s death but credits the birth of his and partner Lauren Silverman’s son, also named Eric, in 2014 for “saving” him.<\/p>\n
\nHe said: “I\u2019ve really, really enjoyed every successful moment of my career, even when things haven\u2019t gone quite to plan, there\u2019s still a story or something to learn from it.<\/p>\n
\n“That combined journey versus the devastation when you lose someone, it really is meaningless.<\/p>\n
\n“Everything meant nothing at that point, I was desperately unhappy…<\/p>\n
\n“Without question [my son Eric saved me]. I really really had reached the point where nothing matters. I almost can\u2019t even remember everything from that period. It hit me so hard.<\/p>\n
\n“The hardest thing was being on television as well, because I\u2019m like, I feel like a clown. I\u2019m dying inside, and yet I\u2019ve still got to do what i\u2019m being paid to do as best as I could.<\/p>\n
\n“But I put on a tonne of weight, I was eating just junk. Had I got hit by a bus the following day \u2013 I\u2019d be dead, but I wasn\u2019t worried about anything like that.”<\/p>\n
\nSimon noted he still “suffers from depression at times” stressed he never considered ending his life, but it “wouldn’t have bothered” him if anything happened to him.<\/p>\n
\nThe ‘X Factor’ boss has seen how things “come full circle” as his love for his son echoes the bond he had with his own parents.<\/p>\n
\nHe said: “It\u2019s how I feel for Eric, just that pure love. They just want the best for you and in return, you feel the same about them.<\/p>\n
\n“It\u2019s how I feel about Eric. Everything starts to come full circle.”<\/p>\n<\/div>\n
\n
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