A woman worried that she took things too far by setting an ultimatum in her relationship with her husband. However, others are telling her that it might already be time to abandon ship.
On Reddit‘s “Am I Overreacting” forum, the distressed wife explained that she told her husband he needed to make a choice. If he couldn’t, then she was ready and willing to leave him behind.
Keep reading to find out more…
In her post, the woman wrote that her husband had “recently admitted that he has been driving around at night with a female coworker.” They’d reportedly spent about six hours together in the car having “deep conversations.”
“He says the conversations were mostly about him, their dynamic, moral values, and even about how strange it is that they are connecting on such a deep level while both being in relationships,” she wrote.
The Redditor’s husband admitted to having “feelings” for his coworker, which he said he didn’t “fully understand.”
“He also said he has never talked to anyone like this before except me. According to him, she gives him new perspectives that I don’t, because she is more confident and stands up for herself more,” she wrote, adding that he felt “guilty” but “doesn’t want to lose these conversations.”
Her husband had a proposal: “He agreed to stop driving around with her at night, but wants to stay in contact with her.”
She had a different one, asking, “So… am I overreacting for saying: it’s her or me?”
Fellow Redditors rushed to reply, telling her that she was making the right call.
“He told you he has feelings for her and will not cut off contact. He’s already made that decision for you. Don’t be the safe back up plan,” one person wrote.
Another person said that the woman was actually “under-reacting,” adding, “I would consider this cheating. Just because something physical hasn’t happened doesn’t mean anything here.”
“If you are giving him an ultimatum to choose between you (his wife) and coworker (his girlfriend), and he’s not immediately choosing his spouse, you have your answer. This will be the first of many times he does this,” someone else wrote.
Sharing their own personal experience, another person wrote that they stayed in a similar situation. “When my ex finally did leave me, it was so traumatic I ended up in the psych ward,” they wrote.
Their advice: “The relationship is already over, the only thing OP can choose is how much dignity she can walk away with.”
