February22 , 2026

    TikTok Roundup: Frat Hazing, Sexy Babies, and Baby Monkeys

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  • Fuck that washed-up bitch Moo Deng. The newest internet-famous animal is Punch, the baby macaque monkey located in a zoo in Japan. Baby Punch was abandoned by his trifling-ass parents last July. The zookeepers gave him a plush orangutan for comfort, which endeared him to online viewers worldwide. THEN, the older, bigger monkeys started bullying our boy Punch! He now appears to have made some friends, although real ones know that those opportunists are just faking for a little bit of clout now that Punch is famous.

  • True love is beautiful. This week, a woman posted multiple TikToks about getting engaged to her boyfriend. Aww! Phoenix and Blaec — yes, those are their names — met while he was incarcerated and serving a 13-year sentence for planning mass shooting at Wal-Mart and a a movie theater showing Twilight. They have known each other for six weeks.

  • A video filmed on a New York City subway car went viral on X and TikTok this week. It shows a white woman being yelled at by several Black woman on a New York City subway car. It’s unclear why the verbal altercation started, or what it is about. The white woman, identified as Sydney Claire Goins, leaves the car, and then, just as the doors are about to close, leans back toward the car and drops the n-word. Naturally, social media trolls have rallied around Goins and dubbed her The Subway Queen.
  • Speaking of bizarre videos, police raided an Iowa frat house in 2024 and they discovered an alleged hazing ritual. Their body cam footage shows about 50 shirtless white guys standing around stock-still and completely silent. The footage went mega-viral this week for how bizarre that shit looked. Frats and sororities are weird, and you will never convince me otherwise!

  • This question seems to be posed every damn week in this roundup, but why do women post on social media about husbands who seem to hate them? Magazine The Cut published an article on this very topic, aptly titled, “I Love My Husband (Who Hates Me).” It explores several viral TikTok couples as well as self-hating weirdos Kristen Bell and Dax Shepherd.
  • The horrible child abuse of the Epstein files has prompted people to revisit the sexualized marketing campaigns of the children’s brand Frida Baby. [Maybe trigger warning?]

    For example, the company’s three-in-one baby thermometer used the slogan, “How About A Quickie?” Another ad for their rectal thermometer depicts a baby’s bottom with the thermometer near the anus. The ad copy reads, “The closest your husband’s gonna get to a threesome.” The ads seem to imply that the parent would be sexually penetrating the baby with the thermometer. The instructions for a snot-sucker include the phrase, “I get turned on easily.”

    Some of Frida’s ads have been around since 2020, but they have gained extensive criticism in the past week or so.

  • The niche drama saga of the week involves a notoriously rude 911 dispatcher in Bakersfield, California. Last week, one woman named Natalie made a TikTok about her terrible experience with a 911 dispatcher in which she asks, “Why are you such a cunt? Why do you have an attitude for me calling your job, you weird-ass bitch?” She unintentionally opened a floodgate of other TikToks and comments making the same complaints. Now, Bakersfield 911 Operator-Tok has taken off. The Bakersfield Police launched an internal review and cleared the woman, naturally.
  • Do you remember the Gulf Coast Stapletons? Let me refresh you: the husband, Josh Stapleton, was convicted of 20 counts of exploitation of children and is serving up to 20 years in prison. His wife, Brittani, stuck by him and still posts on TikTok, where she antagonizes people such as Chris Hanson — the man who catches sex offenders. She got some karma this week, though, because she burned the front half of her hair off while trying to use her grill.

    brittani stapleton.png

  • Which hair disaster is worse, though: burning your front hairs, or this haircut?

  • Shera Seven, best known as the “sprinkle sprinkle” lady who gives dating advice, revealed that her husband passed away recently. He was 70. She is 46.
  • Whoops: influencer Hallie Batchelder accidentally left out her rolled dollar bill and cocaine (allegedly!) in her Instagram story.
  • Ramadan cats are back, baby! Last year, TikTok was charmed by the viral videos of confused, sleeping cats waking up at the crack of dawn to join their families for suhoor, or the large meal before the day-long fast.

  • Not to be outdone, Lunar New Year cats are here, baby!

  • Mardi Gras was this week, baby!

  • Brazilian carnaval is back, baby! Specifically, the incredibly talented, unbelievably beautiful samba baddies of TikTok.

    It should be a sin that TikToks don’t embed on LJ, because you need to witness the majesty of this dancer up close.

  • Another semi-famous Insta/TikTok girlie got married. Her name is Maddie Somethingorother and she is an NYC influencer, publicist-type girl. Her dress is nice.

    https://instagram.com/p/DU_Ms1JEW39

  • Finally, I will leave you with this video of a lemur basking in the sun. It currently has 32.9 million views on TikTok.

    https://instagram.com/p/DU3QWSpjuUk

    alyssa liu gif.gif
    Our golden queen Alyssa Liu is also tearing up the ‘Tok.

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