Ashley Tisdale, (now Ashley French), best known for her role as Sharpay Evans in the High School Musical trilogy, is opening up about a toxic mom group she was part of in Hollywood—and why she decided to walk away.
In a candid essay for The Cut, French explains why she joined the group in the first place.
“I felt lucky when my friend brought together a group of new moms that she knew,” she wrote. “My friend’s friends were in the same situation as I was. Most of us had been pregnant through the early pandemic, so we missed out on the activities where you meet other expectant mothers.”
“We hadn’t had baby showers or prenatal yoga, and hardly anyone had held our newborns,” she continued. “But finally, we were able to be together, and our kids were able to be together, and it all felt right.”
Over time though, the dynamic began to shift in the once supportive group.
“I began to wonder whether that was really true,” French admitted. “I remember being left out of a couple of group hangs, and I knew about them because Instagram made sure it fed me every single photo and Instagram Story.”
French also explained another scenario that left her feeling alone. “Another time, at one of the mom’s dinner parties, I realized where I sat with her — which was at the end of the table, far from the rest of the women. I was starting to feel frozen out of the group, noticing every way that they seemed to exclude me.”
At first, French tried to brush off the negative feelings, convincing herself everyone was just busy and that it wasn’t “a big deal.” But the situation only worsened.
“And yet, I could sense a growing distance between me and the other members of the group, who seemed to not even care that I wasn’t around much,” French explained. “When everyone else attended a birthday dinner together, I was met with excuses as to why I hadn’t been invited. I still don’t get why I wasn’t at the girl hang that they all planned at my daughter’s birthday.”
Finally, Tisdale decided enough was enough and texted the group. “This is too high school for me and I don’t want to take part in it anymore.”
The response was mixed. Some tried to make amends—one sent flowers, then ignored her when she thanked them. Another insisted everyone assumed she’d been invited and simply hadn’t shown up.
“Then why didn’t anyone ever ask where I was?” French wondered. “To be clear, I have never considered the moms to be bad people. (Maybe one.) But I do think our group dynamic stopped being healthy and positive — for me, anyway.”
French concluded her piece urging readers to follow their gut instinct when it comes to friends groups.
“Motherhood has enough challenges without having to wonder if the people around you are on your side. You deserve to go through motherhood with people who actually, you know, like you. And if you have to wonder if they do, here’s the hard-earned lesson I hope you’ll take to heart: It’s not the right group for you. Even if it looks like they’re having the best time on Instagram.”
